“you don’t say. . . pink? well, I guess stereotypes just don’t hold all the time. . . how long? . . .” Donnie cradled the phone in his shoulder as he scribbled down what April said. “to tell you the truth, I don’t know, it could be too late as we speak. . . no, no more incidents, but he hasn’t gone back to sleep since that last time he woke up screaming. . . yeah, I’ll say, I thought my blood was freezing in my veins. . . yeah, it creeps me out too. Thanks so much for going over there, we all appreciate it. . . sure, I’ll tell him. Don’t give up hope, April. I’m sure we’ll get through it. yeah. Bye.” Donnie hung up the phone. He sighed. He knew he sounded insincere in his reassurence to April, but it was becoming harder to keep up an optimistic attitude about it. he looked over to where Raph sat on the couch, staring expressionlessly at the tv, still bandaged, but healing rapidly.
He was slipping away so quickly, Donnie wasn’t even sure he saw any of them anymore. He had reinstated his resolve not to sleep, much to the chagrin of his family, who feared another violent  incident. However hard his resolve, however, his weakened state was obviously worsening. His brothers and father could only speculate as to what was worse, hallucinations brought on by lack of sleep, or his terrible nightmares. They could only watch from a short distance, and step in when Raph got out of control. Perhaps he was already beyond their control.
Raph’s whole body felt numb. He knew the physical pain was there, but it was confined to the background, nothing more than a dull throb that he no longer noticed. His vision was blurry, his eyes red-rimmed, with circles underneath. The food Mikey continued to try to coax into him sat untouched. It was obvious that he had already lost weight. he thought idly that he wouldn’t really mind just wasting away, fading into the background like a ghost in a movie. How long would this empty shell sit here, before finally being removed? Or perhaps it, too, would fade away, leaving an empty spot on the couch where the others could occasionally look, wondering why it seemed as if something was missing.
The edges of his vision were darkening. He did nothing to stop it. even his resistence seemed to have faded. He groaned softly as his eyes slid closed, and his nightmare world welcomed him with open arms.
“he’s fallen asleep, I think.” Mikey whispered from where he bent over Raph.
“did you check his pulse?” asked Donnie, coming over.
“what if he bites me?”
Donnie rolled his eyes and placed a finger on Raph’s wrist. “just passed out. We ought to move him.”
Mikey grasped Raph underneath his arms, while Donnie hooked his elbows around Raph’s legs. With a minimum of grunting, they managed to get him into his room and onto his bed. after he was settled and covered, they still remained, standing in the doorway, looking at him.
“what are you thinking?” whispered Donnie.
“I’m thinking I’ve never been this scared in my life. I mean, how do we fight something we can’t see or feel? I’m scared of this. . . thing, I’m scared that we’ll lose Raph, and I’m scared of him alone.”
Donnie nodded, “well, April says this Ghost person might be able to help.”
Mikey turned to him, “but what if he can’t? what do we do then?”
splinter came up behind them, placing a gentle hand on their shoulders, “if it comes to that, there may only be one option left to us.”
Donnie pressed his lips together and stared at the floor. Mikey cocked his head to the side in question.
“the kindest thing to do may be to end his suffering.”
Mikey bit his lip as a tear pricked his eye. He couldn’t believe they were really talking about killing Raph. . . perhaps that would be the kindest thing to do after all, though.
“let us leave him to sleep. Leave the door open so we will know if he wakes.”
Donnie reached over to turn off Raph’s light. Mikey grabbed his wrist before he could.
“can we leave his light on? just. . . humor me, I don’t want him alone in here. . . in the dark.”
Donnie nodded and followed splinter out, casting a last look at his brother, wondering how much longer he would be able to take Raph’s presence for granted.
**************
*I thought I fell asleep. . .* Raph stared up at his ceiling as he lay on his bed. *how did I get here?* the ceiling started to rise, becoming impossibly high, before fading away. His walls, also faded into blackness, as did the floor until it was only him, laying there in darkness. He stood up, surprised that he was able to. he looked about him. There was nothing but a black void on every side. He was neither cool nor warm, this place seeming to be devoid of feelings.
“I know you’re out there.” He called into the blackness, which swallowed his words like a gaping maw, consuming the sound as soon as it left his lips. “what do you want this time?”
only silence answered him.
“you can’t make me believe anything, this time. all this. . . it’s all just a dream. You can show me as many pictures of my ‘dead’ family all you want, I won’t believe it.”
there was no reply, no challenge to his proclamation.
“WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU, YOU BITCH?!” Raph screamed into the darkness.
“closer than you think. . .” whispered the voice into his ear. Before he knew what was happening, he was slammed back down onto his shell, a painful crack vibrating through his body.
Amy was standing above him. Her naked flesh was full and pink, her hair dark and thick, swirling about her shoulders in a nonexistent breeze. She had eyes instead of empty sockets, the irises a bright blue. She knelt down beside him, stroking his cheek with the back of a warm, soft hand. A scent akin to wildflowers wafted toward Raph.
He lay, stunned, unable to move as she leaned toward him and planted a light kiss on his lips with her own full, petal-soft ones.
“what. . . what. . .?” stammered Raph.
Amy giggled lightly, running her hands through her hair, the line of her arm leading down toward the perfect curve of her creAmy breast, ending with a rosebud-pink nipple. “do I surprise you, lover? Do you remember why you wanted me? do you want me again now?”
“b-but, I never. . .”
she placed a finger over his mouth, ending his confused words. “it’s alright. I forgive you. I forgive you for all of it. if I can just have you now, that’s all I need. . .”
she leaned forward to kiss him again, her tongue probing, seeking an entry this time. he looked into her eyes. *they’re dead. . . she’s dead. . . shit. . .* they were fathomless, but glazed over as the gaze of a corpse, and deep within the pupils, that familiar ominous red glow. . .
he suddenly reaLized her skin was not so soft as pliant, like putty, anything coming into contact with it digging in to make an impression. Her warmpth was false, as if it were a heated blanket covering the cold interior, and it was suffocating and uncomfortable, that flowery scent too strong, too chemical, making his head spin. Her long, thick locks whipped about his face, stinging his eyes. Her skin was not creAmy, but sallow, and hanging as if slightly too big for what lay beneath.
Raph whimpered and tried to twist his body away from her, moving his head to avoid her rank breath. “get away from me, you dead fuck!!” he growled, hoping the malice in his voice masked its trembling.
She pulled back. already her skin was becoming grey, shrinking back to her skin. Her eyes melted away to be replaced by those familiar empty, maddening holes. Her gentle smile pulled back into a grimace, revealing those razor-sharp teeth, “you should of thought of that before you got yourself into this, *my love*” she spat out the last words, which felt like a slap in the face.
“leave me alone!”
“never. . . you’re mine! MINE!!” with an insane cackle, she grasped his legs in a crushing grip, her nails gouging into his skin. She thrust his thighs apart and, to Raph’s horror, he was helpless to stop her, his limbs once more feeling as if filled with lead.
“no. . .” he whispered.
“YES!!” she shrieked. She reached up and pulled out his cock, hard despite his revulsion, as if his body’s responses to her were no longer under his control. “big, aren’t you?” she snickered. She raked her nails across the soft flesh of his crotch, marking her possession of her plaything.
He cried out. He felt tears of terror and pain pricking at his eyes. His mind screamed at him to struggle, to kick out at her or to curl into a protective, fetal position. but he could do nothing but lie there as she spread her legs to reveal cold, pale, wrinkled flesh in between, covered slightly by sparse, wiry hair that abraded his flesh as she lowered herself onto him.
she threw her head back, crying out in her own pleasure, her own voice mingling with Raph’s anguished scream. She bent over him, grasping his shoulders in her vice-like grip. Laughing insanely, she opened her mouth and bit into his shoulder, tearing away a ragged chunk of flesh.
Blood. . . his blood. . . dripped from her mouth, running down her throat and over her sunken breasts, continuing over her ridged ribs, over her concave stomach, pooling between her legs, where she enveloped him. inside her, it was hot. Too hot. Raph felt as if he was being burned from his groin, the unbearable heat spreading to his legs and torso, climbing up his arms like firey spiders. He sobbed and screamed incoherently, his protests and denials drowned out by his tormentor’s cries of triumph.
Even through his pain, he could feel himself reaching the climax, reaching toward that point where it would be over, it would all be over. He came closer as she ground her hips into him, closer as she bit into his throat, spattering blood over his face and plastron, closer as his innards disintigrated in the fire which consumed him from the inside out.
“fool. . .” she suddenly whispered in his mind. His pounding heart froze. “do you think I will release you so easy?” she shrieked again in a twisted victory cry.
Raph’s world spun. He was consumed by flames, the raging inferno framing that horrid face, that taunted his mind’s eye.
He woke with a gasp, his skin still hot, though cooling quickly with the cold sweat that seeped from his pores. His cock still throbbed, beneath his plastron. He curled up on his side. He couldn’t recall ever feeling this self-loathing in his life. He wanted to tear off his skin. He wanted to burn every place that she had touched him. he wanted to scrub his entire body with sandpaper until he bled. There was no escaping. She was too powerful.
He blinked as a thought occured to him.
Perhaps there was a way out of this hell after all. . .
************
Leo opened his eyes. He immediately swore at himself. He had dozed off on his shift, staying awake in case Raph needed him while his brothers and father slept. The past week had been taxing on all of them, and even Leo had his limits, though he was extremely reluctant to admit it. His adrenalin that had kept him going all these days had finally worn off.
Grumbling at himself, he stood up from his seat on the couch and stretched his bunched muscles. He yawned and tried to blink his eyes back into focus as he walked back to check on Raph, just in case. *It’s not like he’d hesitate to wake me if he needed something.*
he poked his head into Raph’s room. It was empty. Raph was gone.