Chapter 6: The Politics Of Politics

    Rincewind’s eyes fluttered open to the warm yellow light of early morning. Gods, he was comfortable. Very. This was all at once unnatural and baffling. He closed his eyes, and the memory hit him. Slowly, as if afraid of what he might see, he looked down. He immediately averted his eyes to the ceiling. Had all that really happened? Just the way he remembered it? Did the scrawny, cowerdly wizard really have the patrician of Ankh-Morpork curled up beside him, head on his shoulder, sleeping calmly, his warm breath caressing the wizard’s bare collarbone? Rincewind looked down again. Vetinari’s hair was tousled, hanging over his eyes, seeming to shave years off of his age. Vetinari’s lips were slightly parted. Rincewind realized how pink they were, thin but delicate. Cute. Very cute.
    *CUTE?!?! What in all the hells am I thinking?!*
    *you’re thinking you’d like to bonk him. or the other way around. Both are equally appetizing, don’t you think?*
    *go away, you! I’m not listening to you! you got me into this mess!*
    *I got you blown, in a good way!*
    *but then what? I’ll tell you what: he’ll wake up, with a massive headache, due to all the wine he consumed, who knows how many bottles he went through before I got here! and then, and then, he’ll see me! he’ll see that we’re. . . we’re. . .*
    *scrumtuously unclothed?*
    *buck naked! What’ll he think then? I’ll tell you what he’ll think: ‘this wizard chap, he’s in bed with me, he must have taken advantage of me in my drunken state! I think I’ll have him tortured, then I’ll have his head sawed off with a dull kitchen knife, and impale it on a pole as an example to the general public!’ THAT’s what he’ll think!*
    *whoa, calm down there, tiger! You’re blood pressure is off the charts. Just take a deep breath. . . slowly. . . there. Look on the bright side: if he is upset, maybe he’ll let us off with a spanking!*
    *you. . . you. . . you’re sick!*
    *sick is in the mind’s eye of the beholder. I am YOUR libido, after all. . .*
    *don’t you dare blame this on me! I’m leaving!*
    *already? But we havn’t made it to home base yet!*
    *WE are going to do nothing of the sort! I am going to get out of here as inconspicuously as possible!*
    *okay, fine, just one thing before you leave,*
    *what is it. . .?*
    *just touch it, just once, for me. . .*
    Rincewind rubbed the heel of his free hand into his eyes. *why me?*
    *because-*
    *shut up.*
    he looked down at Vetinari again, ignoring the twangs of hesitation. Very slowly, he raised his arm which had previously been around Vetinari’s shoulders, taking care that the patrician’s head hit the pillow lightly. He gave a small grunt of difficulty. He hadn’t noticed that Vetinari’s arms were wound securely around his waist. He gave them a small, experimental shove. He then tried to work them apart, but for all his soft curses and tactical shifts, Vetinari’s arms only seemed to hold him tighter. It was when he began to feel the breath leaving his lungs that he realized they *were* getting tighter.
    “what,”
    Rincewind gave a jerk.
    “on this great disc gave you the idea that you could leave? I certainly don’t recall giving you permission.” Vetinari opened his eyes and stared into Rincewind’s.
    “er. . . well, I. . . you see. . .” he suddenly clasped his hands together over his heart, “please don’t kill me!”
the patrician let go of Rincewind’s waist and levered himself up on his elbows, leaning his face close to the wizard’s, “the very thought could not be further from my mind. Perhaps you take me for a fool that would stumble blindly into something he would later regret?”
    “n-no, of course not, it’s just that-“
    Vetinari silenced him with a kiss, sucking lightly on Rincewind’s lips. He kissed him again at the corner of his mouth and raised his head, “it may not be a terribly good idea to underestimate me.” the patrician sat up and swung his legs over the bed. Rincewind tried not to let his eyes gravitate to Vetinari’s anatomy. “or yourself.” Vetinari added. He stood up, “now, I truly regret to have to leave, but there are, as always, pressing matters for me to attend to. I’m sure you understand.”
Rincewind lay back and nodded dumbly. At that moment, a curious tabby cat with bent whiskers and ears covered with blue fur jumped onto the bed, clawing at the covers and yawning. Rincewind’s voice caught in his throat. He pointed at the animal, his mouth working in shock. “n-no!” was the only word he could manage.
    Vetinari looked over his shoulder, “oh, yes, her. I’d rather forgot to inquire if you knew about her curious little. . . characteristic.”
    “no. . .”
    “I admit, it did strike me when I first found out.”
    “no?”
    “it is rather an interesting, though long and involved story involving her mother, her father, a bucket of blue dye, the family cat and a rather nearsighted old witch. I believe a mackeral was involved somehow.” Vetinari’s eyes turned thoughtfully upward for a moment as he buttoned up his shirt.
    “no.”
    “mrrow?”
    “no.”
    “mrrt?”
    “no.”
    “well, I see you two have plenty to talk about, and I do have a full schedule, so if you will excuse me,” Vetinari finished buttoning his high-collared robe, which hung on him in shapeless folds, “I will have the servants deliver breakfast to you. I do hope we will convene again this evening, if you feel so inclined.”
    “no.”
    “enjoy your day.”
    “no.”
    Vetinari left, closing the door behind him.
    Rincewind lay prone on the mattress, staring at the ceiling. He wondered if he was perpetually in shock, or if he just thought he was, but got used to it after such hectic adventures as he was always being thrust into. He looked down at Brian, who was currently wandering among the mussed blankets, probing them for a good place to lay down. “I suppose you feel smug about all this. . .” he scowled at her.
    He couldn’t be sure, but he could almost say that she had looked at him and grinned. She then flopped down, between his feet, leaning her back against his calf.
    Suddenly, the door swung open and a portly maid came in, bearing a tray piled high with toast, fruit, bacon, sausages, eggs and assorted condiments.
    With a squeak and impressive speed, Rincewind grabbed the hem of the nearest blanket and pulled it up to his neck, sending Brian head-over-paws in the process.
    “oh don’t mind me, dear.” Said the maid, gray strands of hair escaping from her cap, her face bearing good-natured lines, “it’s so nice to see someone in the Lord’s bed aside from himself. I imagine it’s been *quite* awhile since our patrician’s had a good tussle!”
    “b-but we didn’t. . . I never. . .”
    “well, someone was, or were those sounds coming from the next room?”
    “s-sounds?”
    “indeed. Why, when I came to find out where all the staff had gotten to, they were clustered around that there door,” she said, indicating the one she had come through, “giggling and gossiping, they were. Ah, young people, so enthusiastic!”
Rincewind groaned and pulled the blanket over his head, causing Brian to tumble over the edge of the bed, landing on the floor with a ‘thunk!’.
    “there, there, no need to get upset, we’re all very proud of you,” the maid patted blanket fondly in the approximate area of his head, “I do hope you stay with us longer. Oh, what am I doing, chit-chatting like this, must get going. Do have a nice day Mr. . . I don’t believe I caught your name. . .”
    “rrnnwnn. . .”
    “pardon?”
    “rrrnswnnd. . .”
    “very well, Mr. Swin. Do enjoy yourself.” She backed out of the room and closed the door behind her.
Rincewind stayed under the covers, somehow hoping that it would make all the horrors of the world outside be less real. Of course, there was once such horror that really wasn’t all that horrible. . . not at all in fact. . . Rincewind shook his head, trying to ban all thoughts of the patrician from his head.
    *denial is an ugly thing. . .*
    *bite me.*
    YOU KNOW, DENIAL REALLY IS AN UGLY THING.
    “you can bite me as well!”
    ARE YOU GOING TO EAT THAT?
    “yes! Go away!”
    FINE, AS YOU WISH. Death floated sulkily though the wall.
    Rincewind sighed, stood up and pulled on his trousers, which had been hanging from the mantle-piece. Despite his efforts, he couldn’t prevent a wry smile from touching his lips.
********************
    “were you *ever* planning on telling me you could turn into a cat?”
    Brian sniffed, “you never asked.” She finished buckling the saddlebag onto Ostentatious’s flank.
    Rincewind scuffed the hay-strewn stable floor with his foot, “oh, well, pardon me, I should have just come right up and asked ‘oh, by the way, you wouldn’t happen to be able to turn into a scruffy-looking tabby cat with crooked whiskers, would you?’ must have slipped my mind.”
    The short young woman threw him a sly look over her shoulder, “as I understand, that’s not the only thing of yours that’s rather slippery. . .”
    “what. . . what. . . what the bloody hell does that mean?!” his voice cracked with panic.
    “oh, nothing.” She snickered, pulling herself onto her horse’s back, narrowly avoiding falling over the other side into a pile of manure.
    Rincewind grumbled to himself, eyeing her bags, bulging and hanging with odd items, “I say, where’s the Sapient Pear-dragon, or whatever it is you call him?” he asked out of purely morbid curiosity.
    “oh, I leave him here with Lucky when I travel abroad. That way, if he or anyone else ever needs to reach me, they can send the dragon. The little bugger could find me in the darkest, deepest dungeons of the dwarves!” she crowed proudly.
    “oh. Well, I imagine he’d have to, wouldn’t he?”
she leaned down toward him, “sarcasm will get you nowhere.”
    She overbalanced and fell off.
    Sighing, Rincewind turned and stalked out of the stables, Brian’s curses echoing in her ears.
    His footsteps, matched by his guard, echoed hollowly through the corridors. The early evening light stretched through the windows, just beginning to take on an orange tinge. He leaned on the sill of one of them, looking out over the sprawl of Ankh-Morpork. It really wasn’t so ugly, from here. Of course, it would have to be ugly from anywhere, but less so from the palace, looking down on the richer neighborhoods, and toward the larger city where torches were just beginning to be lit on storefronts and restaurant windows.
    Blowing a raspberry at the whole scene, he continued wandering aimlessly down the corridor, taking twists and turns at random. He came to a set of double doors, open wide to the richly furnished corridor.  Rincewind tossed a look inside as he walked past. Then stopped, turned around, and peered in again.
    “ah, Mr. Rincewind. How thoughtful of you to think to visit me.” Vetinari stood up behind his desk and beckoned the wizard inside.
    Rincewind shuffled in and looked about him at what could only be the Oblong Office. “nice office.”
    “thank you. It does well to suit my purposes.” Vetinari picked up a sheaf of papers he had been examining, tapped them on the desktop to even them out, and placed them carefully in an impeccably organized drawer. He gestured toward Rincewind’s guard with a hand, and the wizard soon found himself alone in the oblong office with the patrician of Ankh-Morpork, with the doors closed.
    “ummm, nice view from the windows, here.” said Rincewind, trying to ignore the feeling of Vetinari’s eyes on his back, and the subsequent stirring in his breeches.
    “really? I seldom take the time to appreciate it. perhaps I should take more time out of my day in order to. . . appreciate the circumstances under which I often find myself.”
    Rincewind felt the slightest brush of fingers across his behind. His knuckles went white gripping the window sill, trying to maintain some sense of control over his impulses, all of which told him to turn around, fling his arms around the skinny, dark-haired man that stood behind him, and fondle him like there was no tomorrow.
    *why ever not? it’s not like he’d object. . .*
    *but. . . but this is his office! It would be. . . it would be. . .*
    *terribly exciting! And that desk. . . dark cherry-wood, isn’t it? A fine grain, too. I wonder what it would be like to be-*
    *GAAAAH! Shut up! now!*
    *ok, fine, I’ll just go and entertain myself by stimulating your genitals, how would that be?*
    *why you. . .*
    before Rincewind could come up with a fitting insult for his libido, Vetinari slipped his arms around his waist and rested his chin upon his bony shoulder. “I find it continually difficult to put into words this strange. . . magnetism you seem to hold.”
    “er, well, no offense, but you seem to be the only person who thinks so.”
    “I see no problems with. . . selective charisma.” Vetinari slid his hand into the front of Rincewind’s robe and grasped the wizard’s shirt, pulling it up and running his cool fingers over Rincewind’s warm flesh, playing idly with the sparse brown hair on the wizard’s chest.
    Rincewind let out a small groan and leaned his head back, pressing the side of his face against Vetinari’s neck, his hat flopping to the floor.
************
    “well, where are they? It’s getting dark, and the bedroom’s empty!” a young female assassin hissed to the one hanging from the gutters beside her, peering into the window to the Patrician’s bedroom.
    “be patient, Madison, they were here last night.” he hissed back at her.
    Another black-clothed figure dropped silently down to hang beside them, “alright, when’s the show start, Maximilian?”
    “I have no idea, we just have to wait!”
    another two figures dropped down.
    “gods, how many people did you tell, Rawlings?” asked Maximilian of his companion.
    “just a few. Not many.”
    “oh, hallo, Madison. Didn’t know you were still stationed in Ankh-Morpork!”
    “issat you, Nick? Jolly good to see you again!”
    “This is my pal, Jackson.”
    “’llo, Jackson.”
    “Nice to meet you, Ms. Madison.”
    “do you know Maximilian?”
    “No, I don’t believe we’ve met.”
    “hello, Jackson. Nice to meet you.”
    “Nice to meet you, Maximilian.”
    “Same here, Maximilian.”
    “Nice to meet you, Nick.”
    Another figure, a tall woman, dropped down. “did I miss anything?”
    “not yet, Grace.”
    “ah, good.
    “do you know Rawlings?”
    “No, nice to meet you. I’m Grace.”
    “Nice to meet you grace, this is Nick.”
    “Nice to meet you, Nick.”
    “excuse me?”
    all eyes swiveled toward another assassin, who had hopped lightly from another area of the wall, to approach the group.
    “issat you, Smith”
    “yes, yes, it’s me. look, you’ve all got the wrong room!”
    “the wrong room? What do you mean?”
    “I mean the skinny wizard and the Patrician are getting it on in the Oblong Office!”
*************
    The patrician’s metal quill-holder clattered to the floor as Rincewind’s hand, seeking a grip on the edge of the desk, swept it off. He braced a foot on the patrician’s chair, the other swinging freely, as Vetinari mercilessly teased a hard, pink nipple, one hand pinning Rincewind’s wrist to the desk, the other stroking the wizard’s erection with a torturously slow and light touch. Rincewind groaned and arched his back.
    the assassins jostled with each other for a view through the window.
    “ow! Get yer damn elbow out of my face, Max!”
    “someone just touched me boob!”
    “er, sorry, that was me. just got a little excited.”
    “whoo, yer not the only one, mate!”
    “did you see how fast old Vetinari got that chap’s pants off? It defies physics, I’m tellin’ you!”
    “he’s so cool. . . *sigh*”
    Rincewind sat up and took Vetinari’s head in his hands before the patrician could engulf him in his very talented mouth, “wait,”
    Vetinari stood up, “is there something wrong?” he saw the raw hunger in the wizard’s eyes, and knew the answer to his question.
    “I. . . I want you to. . .”
    Vetinari gave Rincewind a feral grin and deftly flipped the wizard over on his stomach, grabbing his butt cheeks underneath the shabby robes and giving them a squeeze. “you know, it always has been an aspiration of mine to screw on my desk. . .”
    “really?”
    “I assure you.”
    “then perhaps we can dispense with the conversation and get down to business.”
    “I quite agree. There’s just one problem.”
    Rincewind peered over his shoulder at Vetinari, “what?” *is it me?* he thought frantically.
    Vetinari blinked at him, “surely you don’t want me to go in there without lubricant?”
    Rincewind reddened, “oh. Yes, hadn’t thought of that. . .” he propped his chin on his hand and swung his legs idly as Vetinari began opening various drawers.
    “the wife of a politician gave me lavender-scented oil for Hogswatch last year. . . I know I’ve been keeping it in my desk somewhere to keep it from smelling of ink. . .”
    Rincewind drummed his fingers on the wood and sighed.
    “ah-ha.” Proclaimed Vetinari, holding up a small vial. He leaned over Rincewind and talked softly into the wizard’s ear, “are you sure?”
    Rincewind felt the pangs of nervousness in his stomach, but an even more overwhelming desire to meld somehow with the dark man who seemed to hold his very consciousness in a smooth, but firm, grip. “yes.” He whispered, gripping the edge of the desk as if it were the only thing keeping him from losing his sanity.
    Vetinari slowly coated his fingers with the liquid and lifted the edge of Rincewind’s robe.
    “Whoa!” Rincewind yelped and convulsively stubbed his toe on the desk at the unfamiliar sensation of a warm finger slid inside him, massaging his opening gently. Rincewind bit on his bottom lip as Vetinari coaxed his opening wider, sliding in another finger, still moving them in and out in a slow rhythm. When the cramps of nerve eased in Rincewind’s stomach, and he began to enjoy the sensation in earnest, Vetinari withdrew his fingers.
    “oh yeah, this is the best!” sniggered one assassin.
    “on his desk, no less. . . I still can’t believe they’re going to do it on his desk. . .”
    “I dunno, the idea kinda turns me on.”
    “okay, who just grabbed me bum?”
    “. . .”
    “do it again!”
    POPCORN?
    “yes, thanks.” Maximilian gave a furtive sidelong glance to someone he was sure hadn’t been there before.
    COME HERE OFTEN?
    “my second time.”
    “my first.”
    “mine, too. Max, here caught the first show.”
    AH. YES. I DID AS WELL. QUITE AN INTERESTING PHENOMENON.
    “you’ve got a talent for understatement, buddy.”
    ‘BUDDY’?
    Vetinari coated his throbbing cock with the oil and used a knee to coax Rincewind’s legs apart. “are you ready?”
    “y-yes.”
    “are you sure?”
    Rincewind answered by bumping his rear against Vetinari’s hot groin, sliding a foot along the patrician’s calf. Vetinari spread Rincewind’s rear cheeks and slowly slid inside him. Rincewind gave a small cry of surprise, then moaned as Vetinari began thrusting slowly, withdrawing almost completely, then burying himself inside. Vetinari threw his head back in ecstacy as his rhythm increased. He gritted his teeth and grunted, Rincewind’s own small sounds of pleasure mixing with his own. The wizard rocked his own hips in rhythm with the patrician’s, feeling pressure upon that center of his sensitivity.
    “gods,” he panted, sweat beading on his forehead, “harder.”
    “eager, aren’t you?” Vetinari replied, a smile evident in his voice. He went in harder, slamming into Rincewind, the wizard practically writhing beneath him. He bit his lip to keep from screaming at the tightness around his hot member. He bent over the wizard, threading his fingers through Rincewind’s unruly hair, slipping his other arm around his chest, pressing them together. A strangled sound escaped his throat as he approached the edge.
    Rincewind groaned at the stimulus, as if in response.
    HE NEVER CEASES TO IMPRESS ME. commented death, popping another kernel of popcorn into his skull.
    “ooooh, I can see why, mate. . .” said an assassin, with a hand in his pants.
    “w-which one?” asked another breathlessly.
    “either.” Said a third, popping another handful of popcorn into his mouth.
    “I think I’m gonna come. . .”
    “this is better than dogfights!”
    “okay, whoever keeps touching my breasts should either cut it out, or leave your hand there, you’re driving me mad. . .”
    “I can’t help it, I’m compulsive about tall women in black. . .”
    “move your hand lower.”
    “here?”
    “lower.”
    “uh. . . here?”
    “lower.”
    “here?”
    “yes.”
    “can I keep it there?”
    “I’ll kick you in the nuts if you don’t. . .”
    “jolly good. . .”
    “how come *he* gets all the good stuff?”
    STRANGE HOW THINGS WORK OUT.
    “indeed.”
    Vetinari abruptly threw his head back, his eyes screwed shut, his mouth open in a ragged cry. He slumped over Rincewind, panting as he braced his elbows on the desk on either side of the wizard’s torso.
    “ooooh. . . gods. . .” panted Rincewind.
    “w-what is it?”
    “I’m not. . . I. . . I haven’t. . .”
    Vetinari ran his hand down Rincewind’s side and toward his inner thighs, his hand brushing against the still-throbbing erection therein. Vetinari then grasped Rincewind’s cock in one hand, and his waist in the other arm, pulling him back until Vetinari was seated in his chair, Rincewind, legs splayed, on his lap.
    “let’s see if we can’t remedy that, shall we?” said Vetinari in a husky growl. All at once, he grasped both hands around     Rincewind’s cock, pumping it mercilessly, Rincewind’s hands grasping his hair, his scruffy whiskers rubbing against the sensitive skin on the side of the patrician’s long neck.
    Had they not been so literally wrapped up in each other, they might have noticed the crowd of faces pressed against the glass behind them, and numerous collars, not to mention belts, being loosened.
    Rincewind came with a cry, impulsively biting Vetinari’s neck in the process. He then slumped against the other man, panting and trembling. For a while, neither said anything, simply sitting there, Vetinari’s arms wrapped around Rincewind’s waist, Rincewind’s arms resting atop his.
    Outside, the gathered crowd clapped appreciatively, although not too loudly.
    “brings a tear to one’s eye, that does. . .”
    “I’d give it a ten out of ten.”
    “one hundred percent effort, that’s what it was.”
    I WONDER IF PERHAPS I SHOULD TAKE A HUMAN FORM ONCE IN AWHILE. . .
    “if I don’t get laid tonight. . .”
    “you can come back to my room.”
    “can I come?”
    “of course. Anyone else?”
    “no thanks, we’ll be heading to the tavern to get a room for the night. hey, did I tell you to move your hand?”
    ANYONE WANT SOME POPCORN BEFORE I FINISH IT OFF?
    “no thanks. Although I wouldn’t mind a banana. . .”
    “alright, alright, I’ll sleep with you tonight, just stop wiggling your eyebrows at me like that.”
    Groaning at the necessity for motion, Rincewind stood up and located his pants, pulling them on. Vetinari found his drawers and trousers and straightened his robe. Giving each other a look-over to see that nothing had been neglected, they headed toward the door, Vetinari opening it.
    standing outside were several guards and about half the castle staff, blushing and looking at the floor.
    Scarcely batting an eyelid, Vetinari asked, “is there something I can do to help you?”
exchanging guilty looks, the mass attempted to slink away without being noticed, muttering excuses.
    “er, just thought you might want. . . er. . . some hot towels.”
    “just, um, making sure you didn’t need anything.”
    “well, you never know when someone will make an assassination attempt, sir, just guarding the door. . .”
    “I was. . . um. . . keeping ‘im company.”
    Vetinari nodded to the dispersing company, “well, thank you for your concern. I shall retire now, if there are no more pressing matters?”
    “. . .”
    “very good. Come, Mr. Rincewind.”
    His face beet-red, Rincewind followed him down the hall.
*************

    Rincewind sighed, blinking his eyes open at the morning light. He found that a long-fingered hand was slowly stroking the side of his face. He looked over to see Vetinari staring at him.
    “er, good morning. . .”
    “you left a mark, you know.”
    “I. . . I what?”
    Vetinari tapped the side of his neck where the red bite mark was still visible with a slender forefinger.
    “oh, er, sorry about that. I. . . erm. . . I sort of lost control for a moment there. . .”
    “that’s all right.”
    “oh. Good.” Rincewind studied Vetinari’s eyes for a moment, “um . . . is everything. . . is everything all right?”
    “you’re free to go.”
    Rincewind blinked as the thought settled in. free? To go where? Was he *supposed* to want to go somewhere?
    Vetinari’s eyes shifted toward the ceiling, “I straightened out the details yesterday afternoon. We’ve located the merchants responsible for putting out the various contracts out on your life. They’ve all been arrested for conspiracy to murder. Which means it’s safe for your to leave.”
    “no offense, but I don’t believe this world likes it if I’m ever ‘safe’.”
    Vetinari gave a small smile and nodded. “will you leave?”
    “uh. . . well, that is. . . um. . . will I?”
    “I won’t stop you. If you wish to stay, however. . .” Vetinari trailed off, turning to look at Rincewind once more.
    The wizard turned away, his eyes drawn to the window, beyond which he could just see the rooftops of the city. What would his life be like if he stayed? He would have comfortable accommodations, to be sure. . . he would be protected, and have the company of the patrician every night. it would be delightfully boring. . . but. . . what would his value be other than the patrician’s pleasure object? Would that be his sole purpose? To dwell by himself during the day, and wait in the ‘master’s’ bed at night?
    “I think. . . I think I shall return to the Unseen University. Take up my job as assistant librarian again.”
    Vetinari nodded. He sighed once and sat up, throwing the covers from his legs and standing.
    “well, I can arrange for a carriage to take you there. If you would like any monetary compensation for the inconvenience of being waylaid here. . .”
    Rincewind shuddered involuntarily, “no, no money, please. . .” he suddenly felt that he was in a room with a stranger, someone he hardly knew at all. Who was Vetinari anyway? Who could possibly get close to someone that secretive? Gods, was he really considering ‘getting close’ to him? *I really do need to get out of here. . .* he thought to himself.
    “of course.” Vetinari dressed and paused with his hand on the door handle, “well, I would like to. . . express my thanks for. . .” Vetinari faltered, staring at the floor. He abruptly straightened, looking Rincewind in the eye, his face closed off, the face of a politician, “goodbye, Mr. Rincewind.” He left, closing the door quietly behind him.
    the luggage creaked speculatively.
    “oh, shut up, you.”
    *he’s got a point.*
    “you can shut up too.”
    *fine.*
    “fine.”
    *fine*
    “fine.”
    *fine.*
    “I wonder how much doctors charge for castration.”
    *you wouldn’t dare!*
    “just don’t push it.”
    *fine.*
    “fine.” Rincewind stood up and got dressed, gathering the few belongings that had been in his pockets. He thrust his hat on his head and gestured toward the luggage, “come on, you, it’s time to go.”
**************
Back to Storage
Chapter 5: Sex